Slow Down My Beating Heart….

Last week, I had an investigatory procedure at hospital. I had been a little anxious about the day as I wasn’t quite sure what it would involve and whether I would need further ’work’ done. When the consultant walked in, it was a man that I knew. Our church organises long distance walks/adventure activities for the public. It was on one of these that I met the man who was now leaning over my hospital bed and talking me through what was about to happen. Whilst I’m sure that a stranger would have done the job just as well, I felt hugely reassured and grateful that it was someone that I knew. I felt a sense of peace and perhaps even an inner joy.

In preparation for the procedure, I had, for the previous few days, taken a daily vasodilator (to lower my pulse). The consultant said that this hadn’t had much effect, so he gave me some intravenous beta-blockers. Still my heart rate was too high for the procedure, so I was given a further shot to ‘slow down my beating heart.’ I won’t know the results for a week or two, but I was told that initial indications were positive. I was hugely thankful for this and felt a sense of joy.

The next day I had scheduled to have off work, so Andrew had booked a B & B at the last minute for me to recuperate. (Lots of Brownie points!!XXX ) The room was small, but clean and the bed was really comfy. Bliss! I was hugely grateful and had a deep sense of joy inside.

The next morning, my breakfast was yummy, but what really touched me was that the waitress said that if we wanted we could have our coffee outside on the patio. ‘Wonderful idea’ we thought and went out into the glorious September sunshine to drink our cafetière of coffee. The weather and the coffee on the patio felt like a grace gift from God. I was really grateful and felt a sense of joy.

We then went on to the RSPB reserve at Minsmere. I didn’t want or need a busy or super-active day, but at Minsmere I could slowly mosey around and just ‘be’ a part of nature. It was a beautiful peaceful wander. I was so thankful to be there and felt a sense of joy.

Finally in the evening, I had some extraordinarily delicious Thai food at a street café. In spite of the people sitting next to us being ‘a tad odd,’ it did nothing to ruin the evening. You see, I was so grateful for my food and I had this feeling inside – a sense of joy!

I noticed something wonderful in those two days….I found myself praying without even meaning to because I was so thrilled with God’s blessings…even the small ones like a comfy bed and a nice cup of coffee in the Autumn sunshine!

I’m not entirely sure why some of those things made me so much more thankful than usual and I don’t think it was entirely because of the medication! It has made me think though… can I cultivate a grateful, thankful heart in my every day life….even for the small things? Then, I will find myself praying without even trying and I am sure that I will have a greater sense of inner joy day by day!